C: I Don't Want To Do It

So here I sit, at my mac wondering why so many tears are flowing. I woke up sick this morning, I feel tired, I feel....off. I took a moment to stay in this feeling I am having and what I discovered is that I am having so much anxiety about tomorrow's workout session. I went to the doctor after the last session where I felt so light headed, like I was going to puke and the doc said I have orthostatic hypotension which is a nice way to say, 'you worked your heart to the point of giving yourself a mild concussion'. The answer...talk to your trainer about taking things easier...reworking your routine. When I told my trainer, he said, 'poppy cock...we have to work you hard cara'. So now, here I sit. Worried about what tomorrow will bring. Feeling a lose of control because I paid so much money and don't want to quit the trainer part of my workouts, but feeling sick to my stomach thinking of how the last 2 times have left me ill for 2 days after. The good news I do not want to turn to food. I am determined to stay in this until it passes and not simply cover up what I am feeling. The bad news is I have absolutely no desire to go to the gym, the pool, the ocean, nothing. Even though the sun is shining and I'm sure the pool is sparkling, I just want to curl up and sleep this feeling away.